15 Reasons Why You Should Never, Ever Move To Northern California
By Jill S.|Published December 18, 2016
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Jill S.
Author
Jill is a freelance writer from a small Northern California town and lives in the Sierra Nevada mountains. If you have an idea for an Only In Northern California story, email her at jsanford@onlyinyourstate.com.
It’s a rough place to live, but someone’s gotta do it. Luckily Northern California is home to only the toughest, most self sacrificing kind of folk out there. I mean, look at all these incredibly awful things we have to put up with!
1. The likelihood you’ll get in a car accident increases exponentially because you won’t be able to keep your eyes on the road.
Drive 30 minutes to a couple hours and your scenery can change from mountainous to flat to hilly to forest to coastline. It’s so annoying to live somewhere so breathtaking.
10. There’s no fresh fruits and veggies available in the state. You’re likely to get scurvy the minute you move here.
No exciting stories about rugged outdoorsmen risking everything to strike it rich during the gold rush. No heros of the wild west. Nothing exciting has ever, ever happened.
13. The state insect is really a nuisance to society.
We envy other states that have more exciting and less beautiful bugs representing them.
14. If you move here you’ll probably lose all desire to travel out of state because there are so many places here in Northern California that you would rather go instead. We actually have every climate and experience you could possible want to visit. Did somebody say staycation?
A show of hands, please, for those of us who still remember learning how to square dance in second grade!
Now that we have established how awful it is to live here, move along please. Those of use reading this who are Northern Californians have a lot of great… I mean, awful ways to spend our time in this really unfortunate place we’ve found ourselves.
