It’s the time of year to make sure you’re on You-Know-Who’s “Nice List.” But we’d probably all agree that with or without impending piles of lavish gifts from the North Pole, any time of year is probably a good time to make sure you make the “Nice List,” right?
Let’s take a look at how some Nebraska cities and villages ranked on the “naughty” scale this year. These rankings are based solely on reports from Roadsnacks, who on their own “About Us ” page says their “goal is to show you the real side of places that not everyone wants to hear.” Okay. That’s brave. By the way, from here on out we’ll just refer to them as “that website.” So without further ado, except a side note that we’re merely passing along these rankings and they are not necessarily the opinion of Only In Nebraska – let’s move on with it. Here is Santa’s Naughty Nebraska list this year.
1. The Drunkest City
Ogallala makes the naughty list for being number one on "that website's" list of Drunkest Cities in Nebraska. Their reasoning? Because Ogallala has the most bars per capita of any city in Nebraska. Don't worry, though. If you're from Ogallala, there are worse things than being accused of celebrating too much. Read on to see how your fellow Nebraska cities fared on "that website's" naughty list roundup, compiled by us.
2. The Worst Small Town In The State To Live In
Ouch. Steele City's 100 or so residents might disagree with "that website" on this one. That report cited, among other things, the high crime here. Reportedly 27 residents are likely to be the victim of a violent crime each year in this border village.
3. The Most Dangerous City
Well, Omaha walked away with this title from that website. It's different from #2 above where Steele City was named the worst place "to live in." That website sourced FBI crime statistics and said when you're in the state's largest city you just aren't that safe. Even when weighing in the "nicer" neighborhoods. If you're visiting or live in this city, then your chance of being a victim of a violent crime is 1 in 173. But we kind of expect that from the biggest city in the state, right?
4. The Most Inner-City Ghetto Award
Scottsbluff? Really? Well, here's the reasoning they gave for this great award. They said your chance of being robbed in Scottsbluff is 1 in 25, and that's the second worst in the state. The deal breaker that sunk Scottsbluff to the number one position seems to be "that website's" analysis of the number of Twitter comments from Scottsbluff that used the hashtag #ghetto. That's right - a Twitter hashtag. Seriously. We are serious. See this report
here if you want validation on that Twitter thing.
5. The Snobbiest City in Nebraska
Don't worry, Papillion. It wasn't your neighbors who hoisted you to the top post of Snobby Cities in the state. Actually, you're here only because you seem to outperform other places in key elements like income, the value of your homes, and the big chunk of change you spent getting a college degree. But when you think about it, since you have one of the highest incomes in the whole Cornhusker State doesn't it seem plausible that if you're on Santa's Naughty List you can just buy each other gifts to make sure there are plenty of presents under the tree on Christmas morning?
6. The (2nd) Most Miserable City
We already picked on Omaha in this list so we're granting them a pass and moving onto the place that ominous website listed as the 2nd Most Miserable City in the state: Crete. Apparently all sorts of criteria were analyzed to create this particular ranking on "that website." They looked at things like the average commute time, unemployment rates, the poverty rate and the cost of living, to name a few. Honestly, we don't see it. We love you, Crete!
7. The City with the Most Ashley Madison Accounts
Ut oh, McCook. "That website" pegged you as the Nebraska town with the most members signed up to AshleyMadison.com, the website for married people who are looking for, well...other married people. According to them, there are 709 McCookians registered at the cheating website, and that's more per capita than anywhere else in Nebraska. McCook has a population of under 8,000 residents.
8. The Kinkiest City in Nebraska
We're just going to blurt it out and get it over with: it's Blair. There, that wasn't so hard, was it? "That website" ranked the City of Blair as the Kinkiest in the state and it seems they based the ranking solely on the number of (shh....adult toy) orders per person, not per capita. Curious about the number? They reported that there were 3.1 orders per 1,000 people in Blair. They did not specify in what time period those orders were placed, however. It could a be a week, a month, a year...who knows?
We scoured the internet to find this list. It’s based entirely upon the “research” and “interpretation” of another website. We’re not sure we agree and, for sure we feel this list is meant as infotainment, at best .
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