When you grow up in St. Louis, you carry St. Louis within your soul your entire life. You don’t know you’re any different from the rest of the country. You realize something is wrong when you leave town to visit friends or family. In other places, a good time is something that costs money, only lasts a day, and is only if weather permits. This is when you miss home most because that’s not how we do it in St. Louis. You’re born with the stamina and ability to withstand the extreme heat of July or the extreme cold of St. Louis Mardis Gras. In St. Louis we love to party, we rarely have to pay admission unless it is something that gives us an adrenaline rush, weather does not affect our plans at all, and we hate when the party ends. That’s why our parties are all year round and not just a few hours or one day. Our parties last for days and include tens of thousands of our closest friends. One-hundred-degree heat, pouring rain, or freezing cold, we do not scare easy. Here are 10 ways St. Louis ruins you for life:
1. Why party for one day when we can party for three?
In St. Louis we don’t understand why everyone cuts their parties so short. After all we celebrate our freedom for three days. We are home of America’s biggest birthday party! On the Fourth of July, 250,000 to 275,000 people gather at Fair St. Louis to celebrate our freedom. The party lasts three days! There are air shows, concerts, and lots of food. The best part? It’s free admission! We pay for our beer and food but the concerts, fireworks, and air shows are free.
Our fireworks display is enormous, amazing, and one of the biggest and best in the country. There is a huge display every night for three nights. On the third day is the grand finale. It’s hard to believe it can get any bigger than the first two nights, but it does! If you don’t like crowds, you can find countless displays for free all around several counties.
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3. On the 4th of July we like to visit our friends in Jefferson County because we are not afraid to blow up a few hundred dollars and fireworks are legal there….
In Jefferson County fireworks are legal and our buddies in the county are ready to light up the sky. With fireworks stands everywhere, there is no shortage of places to pick some up. Don’t all grown men shoot bottle rockets at each other for fun? Our friends across the Meramec River are kids dressed as grown men, and they are ready for a good bottle rocket war. That’s right, we don’t see anything wrong with shooting fireworks at our nearest and dearest friends. It’s kind of how we say we love you. The fireworks start the last week in June and last till July 5th. Why? Because we don’t do anything for one day around here.
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5. Who needs New Orleans for Mardis Gras? If it’s a month long party, we are in it to win it!
St. Louis Mardi Gras is second to only New Orleans and it is a VERY BIG party. Lasting from the 12th night in January well into the middle of February, we are throwing down. There is no official count of attendees but, it is hundreds of thousands of partiers celebrating Mardis Gras in St. Louis no matter what the weather.
In St. Louis we pay for beads with our breasts. Seventeen million beads are thrown at Mardi Gras, St. Louis. That’s a lot of boob shots...but don’t get caught working for those Mardi Gras beads ladies, it is illegal. This can sometimes get our women in trouble when they see a necklace they like on a trip. They get confused when a payment in the form of cash is required. You can take the girl out of St. Louis but you can’t take the St. Louis out of the girl.
7. If someone visits you from St. Louis, be aware that we don't pay admission fees very often...
Very few places charge admission fees in St. Louis and we have some of the biggest parties in the country. Our St. Patty's Day celebration is no different. It's free, except for the drinks and food. The beads...well we already covered the cost of those. Who doesn’t celebrate St. Patrick's Day for two days with tens of thousands of people drinking green beer before noon? On St. Patrick's Day in St. Louis, our "Dogtown" neighborhood is a sea of green beads, green beer, live music (of course), and amazing food. During the day the parade is an acceptable environment for children. Just like all St. Louis parties, after about one or two in the afternoon, it’s time to get the kids out of there. When the party starts to kick off it is not kid friendly. It's probably something your kids shouldn’t attend until they are legal age to drink.
What grown adult doesn’t pay 25 to 40 bucks to get chased by a chainsaw wielding maniac to celebrate Halloween? Since this is St. Louis we always consider the possibility there may be an actual chain on the chainsaw. This is one of the adrenaline rushes we WILL pay for. In true St. Louis fashion, why celebrate one day when you can celebrate for months? Halloween kicks off when our haunted houses start opening in September and stay open until a few days after Halloween. We are never too old for Halloween in St. Louis.
9.What’s weird about free ice cold beer at the petting zoo?
We are home of Anheuser Busch Beer and touring the brewery is a great experience for people of all ages. Of course it's St. Louis so admission is free!. Also free is a couple beers for people who are 21 and over. Grants Farm, who is owned by Anheuser Busch, is a wonderful little farm that is geared toward giving our kids a great experience viewing and petting animals. But since it’s St. Louis, of course we get two free beers here as well.
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10. You didn’t grow up with the smell of beer brewing?
We know you out of town folks don’t understand our love for Anheuser-Busch products…
But in St. Louis we were raised smelling the bitter fragrances of hops, yeast, malted barley and wheat. This is the smell anyone who grew up in St. Louis says reminds them of home.
The people of St. Louis are fun, professional partiers, and when it comes to having a good time we don’t pay admission fees for many things. Most of the many amazing things to do in St. Louis are free! We work hard but we play harder. We love to celebrate holidays with our fellow city folk and come together by the tens of thousands on holidays. Stranger or not, we are all family on these days and it’s nice to be surrounded with thousands of people who love St. Louis tradition as much as us. With free parades on every holiday, free fireworks, and free live music at all our events, it’s a tough act to follow. This is why if you were raised in St. Louis you are ruined for life. Which St. Louis tradition is your favorite? Click here for another one of a kind festival you will only find in St. Louis!
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