Michigan has long drawn in tourists with its fantastic attractions, natural charm, and unique events. While these options are worth exploring when weather is warm, wintertime is a whole different story. After all, Michigan definitely doesn’t house splendorous chilly weather sites or fun-filled winter activities for the entire family. Nope. In fact, if you choose to check out our state when it’s cold, you’re in for a whole lot of nothing. Here are nine reasons why no one should ever head to Michigan during the winter months.
1. One word: BORING.
There’s just nothing here, and winter highlights this fact. Ice skating rinks, small town shopping options, wintry festivals, guided snowshoeing outings, outdoor winter beer gardens? Nah, none of these exist in Michigan, so you might as well just find somewhere else to explore in the winter.
2. The scenery is simply hideous.
We don’t know about you, but we’re disgusted by the downright ugly sight of piers covered in ice, Canyon Falls and Gorge as it twinkles with snow, Sleeping Bear Dunes after a winter storm, and Kitch-iti-Kipi on a whimsical winter morning. There’s nothing even remotely magical about this season.
3. The Great Lakes are really only worth seeing in the summer.
Want to walk along the shores of Lake Huron or appreciate the beauty of Lake Michigan? Well, you better plan your visit for the summertime. You’d be underwhelmed by lakeside lighthouses surrounded by snow and unique ice formations atop the water. Nothing to see here, folks.
4. Your kids will wish they were anywhere but here.
Sledding? Snowboarding? Prime snowman-building spots? Don’t look at Michigan for these. If you want your kids to stay entertained and energetic during the cold weather months, you should probably just hop on a plane and beeline it down to Florida, because Michigan offers nothing for little ones.
5. Most of Michigan’s best natural attractions are off-limits in the winter.
Sure, you could probably enjoy some cold weather camping at Muskegon State Park, embark on a frozen waterfall walk at Tahquamenon Falls, immerse yourself in some of Michigan’s ice caves, walk along the banks of the St. Clair River, or peer out at the Straits of Mackinac when they’re covered in ice, but these natural beauties are nothing to write home about.
6. Friendly faces? Michigan has none of those.
Psh. We just don’t do that "Midwest nice" thing here in the Great Lakes State. In fact, the stereotype of friendly midwesterners applies to every other state in the region, but it managed to skip right over Michigan. We Michiganders certainly aren’t kind, accommodating, or helpful, so don’t expect us to help you shovel or get your car out of a snowy driveway.
7. The state’s most charming towns are dreary when it’s cold.
Downtown Holland? Boring during the winter, even with its heated sidewalks. Rochester? Dark and colorless. Traverse City? There’s simply nothing to enjoy here when temperatures drop. Forget about local shops, cozy cafes, and family-owned businesses galore. Our downtown areas somehow lose all their charm and cheer when the seasons change, so you might as well just stay away.
8. When winter storms hit, there’s nowhere cozy to hunker down.
Forget about cozy cabin rentals, peaceful hotels with pretty views, or winter-friendly bed and breakfasts. If you find yourself snowed in here in the Great Lakes State, you’ll be out of luck when it comes to lodging options. Don’t even think about searching for a place to stay – there’s nothing to choose from.
9. Michigan just doesn’t have the makings of a winter wonderland.
At the end of the day, Michigan just falls flat in the winter months. The scenery is bland, the people are cranky, and the opportunities for outdoor recreation are nearly non-existent. That’s right: Michigan is pretty much a bust when it comes to wintertime getaways, so we think you should pick another place to spend your next subzero adventure.
Okay, okay. You caught us: we might have stretched the truth for a few items on this list. In fact, we might even be pulling your leg about all of the above. Is it possible that Michigan is actually overflowing with natural beauty, family fun, and overall delight during the winter months? We suppose you’ll have to come and find out for yourself!
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