11 Sure-Fire Ways to Make a Floridian Mad
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Catherine Armstrong
Author
Floridians are pretty chill people most of the time. We welcome tourists from all over the world and share our beautiful beaches, restaurants and attractions. We’re happy you’re here…but some of the things you do and say can really make us mad.
Some of us are adults, with real jobs and responsibilities. And we certainly don’t want to party during Spring Break when every college student in the entire country is filling our bars and clubs.
Disneyworld is awesome, right? But our state really does have a LOT of other really cool attractions.
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Please don’t feed the gulls. They’re like the worst kind of varmints, and when you start throwing your leftover sandwich bits and Cheetos at them, they swarm everywhere.
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When people come to our beautiful state and throw their empty beer cans and wrappers all over our beaches and parks, we want to throat punch them. We have trash cans for a reason.
"Oh, it’s soooo humid." Uh huh, we know. Because it’s FLORIDA. It’s also sunny and beautiful and we don’t ever get any snow. So shut about it already.
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You do know that you’re in the South, right?
You don’t need snow to celebrate Christmas properly. In fact, we think that a Christmas with palm trees and beaches is just about the best possible holiday celebration.
This is a wonderful place for retirees, but most Floridians do actually wake up and go to work every morning.
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We totally don’t get it when you bother to come here for your vacation, and then belly up to the chain place. Patronize some of our local seafood restaurants, where the fish is fresh and your money helps support the town you’re visiting.
Please refer to number one. While we certainly do enjoy our beaches, we don’t get to lie around sipping Mai Tais and lounging in beach chairs all day.
Guess what? We actually have more than just two cities here. Florida is full of pretty little small towns and vibrant medium-sized cities. You're welcome to stick to Orlando and Miami, but you should know that you're missing out on some other really good stuff.
Floridians have had it rough this week, but we always manage to overcome whatever Mother Nature throws at us. Just to remind you, here are 8 reasons why.
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