15 Things That You Should Never Say To A Coloradoan
By Annie
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Published May 09, 2015
Everyone knows that there are just some things that you should never utter to certain people.. it’s just in bad taste and can result in a throat punch, silent treatment, or passive aggressive messages on social media. If you’re unsure about what not to say to someone from Colorado, you’re in luck! Here are 15 sentences you should never ever say to someone from the 303 (or 720, 719, or 970).
1.) Dan Marino is the best quarterback in the history of the NFL.
John Elway is not amused.
2.) Isn't it always snowing there?
Yes... except for when it isn't (about 300 days a year).
3.) We just moved here from California!
They. Are. Invading.
4.) What kind of accent is that?
I cannot count the number of times I've been asked this question.. what accent?!
5.) Doesn't everyone in Colorado live in the mountains?
Only the lucky ones.
6.) Vermont has the best skiing in the country.
Even Bob Newhart disagrees with that statement.
7.) Peyton's probably going to retire next year.
Your mom is probably going to retire next year..?
8.) (While hiking) Is it going to be uphill the entire way?
It is until I push you down the hill for asking such annoying questions...
9.) Are we going to get attacked by wildlife if we go camping?
*stares blankly*
10.) (While camping) Is anyone else having a hard time finding a signal on their phone?
Oops.. I accidentally just chucked your iPhone into the blazing fire!
11.) Why does everything say "5280"?
Do yourself a favor and unfriend these people right. now.
12.) Isn't Boulder full of hippies?
Actually, there are a lot of hippies in Boulder (I kid, I kid.. kinda).
13.) Can we go to Casa Bonita?
Can we just save the trouble of standing in line for over an hour and share this can of cat food instead?
14.) Can I get you a Budweiser to drink?
Get out! Get out right now!
15.) You just live in Colorado because marijuana is legal.
If you do, you are here for the WRONG reasons.
If you’re friends with somebody from CO, take my advice and never utter these words. To my fellow Coloradoans: What did I miss?
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