25 Undeniable Thoughts Everyone Has While Driving In Alaska
By Courtney
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Published June 16, 2016
Driving in the last frontier can be quite a doozy. The stunning landscapes make it hard to concentrate while the random junk on the side of the road keeps that whole “wild Alaska” thing in crystal-clear perspective. From crazy tourists, abundant wildlife, odd hauls, extreme hazards and harsh winter weather conditions – driving in the great 49th state is filled with “OMG” moments that will genuinely make your jaw drop and make you shake your head in disbelief. Check out these 25 undeniable thoughts that everyone has while driving in Alaska.
1. Look, an abandoned vehicle on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. Totally normal.
2. Dear wind: I know you’re going to rattle my car half to death, but please don’t blow me off the bridge. Sincerely, driver who wants to live.
3. My morning commute > your morning commute.
4. Encroaching on massive human eating machine. And… it’s about time to roll up those windows!
Wink wink, nudge nudge.
5. Oh cool, let’s just gather in the middle of the road for a tourist convention. Looks like someone left their brain in the lower 48!
The matching red coats aren’t convincing us that you are a giant stop sign, people.
6. Cue the horse drawn tourist wagon. Can’t wait to drive 5mph for the next two miles. AWESOME!
7. Wait, are we going to another town or a wildlife sanctuary?
8. Ice fog. FAN-freaking-tastic.
I'd be better off closing my eyes and driving blind.
9. Fireweed, eeeeeek! Oh my! So pretty! And… I almost went off the road.
10. Let's go for a scenic winter drive, they said. It will be fun, they said.
Minus that whole "chance of an overpowering avalanche" thing.
11. Oh look a reindeer in the back of the truck. We must be in the bush!
12. I think there’s a road somewhere under there. Let’s hope this doesn’t turn into a game of bumper cars!
13. WalMart lined with plugins for the below zero winter temps. Yes, this is normal.
Only in Alaska!
14. When snow covers parking spot lines, just throw logic out the window and park like it’s your first rodeo. Brilliance!
15. That whole "are we there yet" question is basically pointless in Alaska.
Is there any end in sight?
16. Mountains… glaciers… scenery… OH MY! Oh wait, I’m still driving. MUST. FOCUS.
F-O-C-U-S!
17. Popped another tire. No surprise here. I swear these roads are better in the wintertime when the pot holes are filled in with snow and ice!
18. Okay kids, were going to play a game called “whoever counts the most personalized plates wins a prize.”
19. Summer. Has. Arrived.
Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Hope there's a honey bucket around the corner!
20. Don’t worry giant moose, we have all day to sit here and wait. Just take your sweet time.
21. Now THAT is a rack worth rubber-neckin’ for!
Lucky son of a...
22. Dear massive jagged rocks: If you could please not come tumbling down at extreme speeds while I'm driving, I will be forever indebted to you.
23. Seems like a perfectly safe neighborhood to me. Aside from the bullet holes on every single road sign and stuff.
24. The entire parking lot is empty and you still have to park so close to me that I can’t open my passenger door.
Go home, you must be drunk. There is no other excuse for this behavior.
25. I guess I’m the chosen one to be stuck behind the plow truck today. Things are about to get real interesting.
Hang on tight!
What other wild thoughts do you have while driving in the last frontier?
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